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Tag Archives: gift

AK not necessary


As a product of the 90’s, I can never think “it was a good day” without qualifying that conclusion with the knowledge that a Russian assault rifle was unnecessary.

Determining the quality of my days since 1993.

I decided we all needed outside time because there was a package in the mailbox and Josh couldn’t get it out by himself.  I figured if I had to put on shorts and go outside, I might as well enjoy it.  I was surprised to find a gift to me!

I love tins! How did you know?

It was a complimentary gift from the HVAC company.  They were very appreciative that I spent a ton of money to replace two A/C units.  Thank goodness we did it just in time for the 80+ degree weather to go back to being cool and comfortable.  Even better than the tin was what was inside:

Most expensive cookies ever.

They were gone quickly.  The afternoon was nice, and we hung out in the front yard and soaked up the afternoon sun.  I was lazy and didn’t even make Robin put on pants.

Living the dream.

We played nature tracker and found this:

My daughter's egg.

Not a bad day.  Not a bad day at all.  Hopefully more days like this.

HEADLINE: Personal Computers Planted in Human Brains!


So now that everyone is a Lieutenant Commander Data style android, I guess it was time for me to get a laptop.

Lieutenant Commander Data doesn't appreciate all this so-called fanfic.

Check out this piece of new crazy pants:

Sketchy. I mean, ETCHY. The design is etched into it.

The Mr. bought this for me as drachenfutter (and because yes, he does love me) on the same day I posted, but before he even read, this post.  I’m going to say I believe him because it makes a good story.

It's even etchy on the inside, but you need a special prescription for that.

It streams like a champ and I can finally play my games on it.  The thing I love second best about it is that it has a fingerprint reader.  I’m so busy I can’t type my 6 character password, I can just swipe my finger across the reader.  I feel so cool, in a way that only an undeserving dork could.

The best thing about the laptop? Chair. Ottoman. Down blanket. Anime.

I’m rich, bitch!


I had some other fucking stupid ass blog post written up but decided to delete it and post this.  Just in case you were unaware:

I am exceedingly prosperous, woman of ill nature!

The fact that I am so incredibly rich must be well known in wealthy circles as I received a very important delivery the other day.

Two day shipping is for peons. Rich people ship OVERNIGHT.

And that’s not all.  Did you see who it was from?

You know how needy small businesses can be.

Apparently, word has gotten around that I have paid off my commoner’s vehicle and am now in the market for something more befitting my station in life.  So they posed a serious query:

The answer is YES. But since I'm rich and have very little time, I will simply say "Y".

Now, I am sure the average layperson like yourself knows nothing about the Porsche 918 Spyder.  It’s okay, I don’t know anything about whatever it is you people do, either.  Here is a basic rundown:

The lithium-ion battery powered vehicle packs a punch, with the ability to go 0 to 60 mph in 3.1 seconds and a top speed of 199 mph. According to Porsche, it also features a “high revving 500-plus horsepower V8 engine assisted by two electric motors with a total of at least 218 horsepower” inspired by the Porsche RS Spyder racing engine. And like any good hybrid, it has an impressive fuel economy: 78 miles per gallon, 16 miles on pure electric charge at up to 94 mph.  That kind of power doesn’t come cheap. The Spyder will retail for $845,000 when it goes on sale in 2013–and only 918 customers will have the opportunity to buy it.

You know, 918 is my favorite number.